Continuing (see Part 1: Mindfulness) our look at how a dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) lifestyle can make life easier and less stressful, we look at the interpersonal effectiveness module. This module is all about having effective and healthy relationships.
Communication
The primary skill taught in the module is communicating your wants in a relationship while maintaining the relationship and self-respect. Using these skills (called DEARMAN, GIVE, and FAST) helps us understand the importance of communicating the things we want from others so that resentments don’t build and doing so in a non-judgemental manner. This section also helps us learn to pick our battles in all our relationships through dialectical thinking. We can use mindfulness skills to help us understand and prioritize our wants.
Validation
Another essential part of the interpersonal effectiveness module is validation. So much of our difficulties in relationships stem from a person feeling invalidated. Validation is letting a person know that their feelings matter, even if you disagree with their behavior. At its core, validation is an expression of love. DBT also explains the need for self-validation, the ability to treat ourselves with kindness and compassion.
Using the skills in interpersonal effectiveness helps us connect deeply with another person, filling our need to express and receive love. These skills apply not only to our intimate relationships but can help in the workplace, with our friends, and with changing unhealthy family dynamics. Next, we will learn about the emotional regulation module of DBT.
Summary
